My body is drunk again
Yet with sober eyes
Still seeing all that I despise
Before me
When did I learn to loathe myself?
To diminish my wealth and damage my health
Because I was not worth the care
Of good choices?
Who taught me that I was a freak?
Leaking disgust seeking
Redemption in ivory
It started when your eyes said
'Something grotesque this way comes’
It began when I looked behind me
To realise what had repulsed you so... was me
It gathered momentum when I realised
It was the touch of my hand
On yours that made you recoil
And I was only five
On and on it went
Year after year
Slight upon slight
All teaching me to
Hate myself
All telling me that
I’m not right
Millennia of demonisation
Has washed over my soul
And crippled my eye
I see nothing but that which
Is unwanted
This dark skin
Its origin disputed
Its usefulness excluded
From legitimacy
I punish myself for being
So unlovely, so un-light
In all that I have done to my body
To attain conformity
Before me I still see
No more
Than all
I have grown to abhor
Nairobi Thompson (c) 2012
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